Sunday, September 30, 2007

Sink or Swim

Ever since I took on my new role, I find myself having less time to blog (the other reason being Polyvore). I have many drafts but struggle to finish them. Hope to be able to do so once quarter-end close is over.

I realised being in a position that I am now, I wonder why people want to be in management level in the first place! You have more responsibilities, need to attend more meetings, and to ensure you maintain a good balance between your superior, peers and staff. There's also the good stuff, but i guess it's always easier to think about the negative rather than the positive.

Every day is a sink or swim situation. Either you make it or you don't. If all fails, just reset and try again tomorrow. I learn that I really must put aside my emotions while doing this job - I don't mean being a heartless person, rather to be able to deal with difficult people and get scolding for sticking to your principles. I have to be objective rather than emotional, and sometimes it can be tough when I find myself doing this to people whom I used to work with in Accounting. Although I know this is just work, but I wonder will the other party take it personally.

Emotions aside, there's the workload. This is the part where I really struggled. It's like those extra baggage being bound to you before they throw you out to sea. I have learnt not to let my emotions overcome myself when managing my work, but it's really not easy :( I have to keep telling myself to just look at the job, and don't think so much. It's a daily brainwashing everyday. Sometimes I offer my job to God, but sometimes I just forgot about it altogether. The frustrating bit is that I receive ten urgent emails, and all ten needs responses TODAY. What? There's not breather! Even if I apply the urgent/imporant point while dealing with work, everything is urgent and important! Sigh......

The past week was bad - I nearly sank. Was working the whole of Saturday. I felt like I was wearing a lifejacket full of holes, and trying very hard to navigate towards the shore. I only have today to rest before another round of madness next two weeks (quarter close). There were times I felt that I wanted to give up, but that is the same as sinking, and so I refuse to sink. I'm already so tired after one month, how could one last for 1 year, or even 10 years!

Sink or swim? It's really all up to me. I hope I am able to make it this round.

1 comment:

lilium said...

I am feeling exactly like u now..tired and want to give up..BUT then I refuse to sink. I believe that I will swim well one day. Just learn it well to be a good swimmer and I will be there!! =) gan bah teh to us!!